Love is a beautiful thing… It is BLIND and it CONQUERS ALL… Isn’t that what we are told or read in romance novels or watch on the entertainment screens?!
With that intro I am now forced to differentiate between mere physical “encounter” and genuine “concern” experienced by two people. My simple variation is that the former is selfish and the latter is not! Now, my intention is not to write a synopsis of a Romeo and Juliet play, I shall therefore depart to the real purpose of writing this piece.
If you’ve read my previous posts, you should have a general idea about Sickle Cell Disease (SCD).Having this condition does not make one sub-human, they continue to experience life just like the next person, including physical attraction or lack of. So at some point they will fall in love with someone and want to have a family. Yes I said it, procreate!
The common notion is that these people cannot procreate or even if they can they should not! You can’t believe what I am saying?! I must reside in a different planet you imagine! But No! Those are ideas discussed in hushed tones far too many times than I can count worldwide! Some even by extremely qualified medical practitioners to my dismay!
We live in a democratic world, freedom of speech to all. That doesn’t mean I have to listen to you merely because you’re gifted in verbosity, especially if you have no data to substantiate your claims, so speak on! However, not all individuals in society have enough mental or emotional strength to resist negative talk. A lie repeated several times soon sounds like the truth!
If there’s anything that often comes without warning or due regard for everyone else it is Romantic Love. It gets both parties by surprise! My girlfriend describes it as being intoxicated, probably since it “blinds” and “conquers”! That’s what most drug addicts say on their way to recovery, that they felt indispensable and senses were numb! Yep, pretty similar, don’t you agree?!
This element of surprise for both participants means you get involved with the least expected person. In rare cases are you fully aware of even the person’s full names! Let alone their health status! Only in rare cases do you suddenly fall in love with someone you have known for like forever! Only then are you somewhat prepared for their challenges.
SCD Warriors are fully aware of their condition from a very young age, except for those with Sickle Cell Trait. They don’t have symptoms, they are carriers for lack of a better term. As a consequence, it’s difficult to detect the trait without appropriate tests. Of which you would not even think of taking these medical tests if you were not aware of SCD and it’s corresponding Types! That’s why SCD Clinics, SCD Organisations and even specific SCD Warriors are trying to create accurate awareness on this condition and eliminate age-old Myths!
SCD Warriors are not exempted from romance and they should also not be made to belive the Myths even when it comes from a professional source unless they analyse all facts available, plus obtain 2nd, 3rd, 4th… opinions from different medical doctors.
However, when you do fall in love, it will be beneficial to you and your partner to go for SCD SCREENING before you decide to conceive. The services currently exist at high end hospitals in Kenya. This screening is overlooked by so many people yet it could save your soon to be “acquired” family from a lot of grief and unprecedented fear! This screening can also be done on new born babies as guided by the Peaditrician.
The screening helps the SCD Warrior know whether or not their partner has the SCD “gene” and if so which “type”. As a result, you will potentially know the medical status of your future offspring and prepare appropriately for them and also review corresponding options for procreation.
Remember, if your partner has genuine concern for you and not merely entertaining physical encounters, this screening will serve as a constructive as opposed to destructive force in your relationship. The contrary is true if your partner is a “fake”, no harm done, you’ve done yourself great justice by coming to this realisation well in advance. Being in a marriage with such a person could be far much worse than experiencing your occasional SCD Crises!
Don’t worry, the right person always comes along with or without the SCD gene, so don’t be impatient. Good things come to those who wait, I should know?!
SCD is always about the “genetic matrix” which is sometimes overuled by divine miracles!
Drop the myths and be empowered!